Humor Me!

"Webster Cook says he smuggled a Eucharist, a small bread wafer that to Catholics symbolic of the Body of Christ after a priest blesses it, out of mass, didn’t eat it as he was supposed to do, but instead walked with it.

Catholics worldwide became furious".   Fox Orlando

Now I'm not Catholic so it is a bit hard for me to appreciate the seriousness of the crime.  But if I stole a piece of cracker from my church, I don't think anyone would mind.  I probably better check next time.

TJ.... Look at all this great blog material coming out of Florida.  I think you are on to something!

For those of you that don't know me, I am a degreed physicist that works as a janitor.  It is of my choosing.  But the things a janitor gets to do is not always of my choosing.  Take today's email for example:

"A child threw up in TC102. I used the remainder of our Super Sorb which is supposed to absorb and get the smell out (it works pretty well). I also vacuumed with the big vacuum.  I would have liked to have done 2 applications, but ran out.  Do we still have the extractor?  Can someone do that tonight for us.  We put masking tape around the area.  Thanks".

Considering this is coming from one of my friends, everything I get to do is not always the thing that keeps me smiling.  The thing that keeps me smiling is that I am a degreed physicist working as a janitor.  Now that is funny!  But, likely only to a physicist.  :)

I hope JR finds this equally funny or I may be getting another "Cleanup on Aisle 3" email again.  I'm laughing!

I'm think I was told this is the shack everyone is talking about.  Something about Shaq having a tough childhood and his momma comes back to visit him and brings a couple friends.

It is life changing because Shaq never really knew his momma and she turns out to be a right good cook.  Now take a guy as big as Shaq and you need someone that can cook when the times get tough.

You only get one vote.  Who's it going to be for?  I don't know yet, because I don't know the answer to the only question that matters to me.  This question is paramount because it is the best indicator of the condition of the candidates heart. 

If you could ask one question of the candidate to determine where you would cast your vote, what might be the most important question to ask?

MARGATE, Fla. -- First he was found in a grilled cheese sandwich, then in a South Florida shower, next on a Hialeah couple's sonogram -- and now Jesus has been spotted on a tree.

A family in Margate said they saw the image of Jesus on a palm tree outside their home.Family members said they can see the image when they are standing at least 2 feet away from the tree. As they get closer, they said, the image disappears.

So you probably noticed there was a couple weeks there when the Holly Fawder was not posting anything.  There has been a bit of a change.  Unfortunately, the Fawder stepped off a curb on the way to the bank and a bus hit him.  It's not a big deal.  He was ready to go. 

Anyway, he passed on this blog to me and I will be introducing myself shortly.  I have to wait for the next round of electricity.....

You do the best you can to prepare for the Holly Fawder's communion.  But sometimes you just can't think of everything.  I ordered up a fresh batch of Holly Vine Squeezin's and had it delivered in time for Sunday's service.  How was I suppose to know you had to provide your own spigot?  Let me tell you, this was not a pretty sight.

The Holly Fawder is a bit confused. Iranian media report that marriage is now a job requirement for all employees at Pars Special Economic Energy Zone Company, one of Iran’s state-owned companies. Employees who are single have been directed to get married by September 21 — or get fired.

I took to wearing this cloth to avoid the hazards of marriage and then some deadbeat country changes the rules.  It's easy to see why they make it mandatory to get married.  I mean, look at them capes.  Imagine me standing on my corner wearing one of them things.  I'd go broke!

The Holly Fawder, a rabbi and the Pastuh were all in a boat out in the middle of a lake.  The Pastuh says,  "I am thirsty.  I will go to shore and get something to drink."  So he gets out of the boat walks across the water to shore, gets a soda, walks back across the water, and gets back in the boat.

The Holly Fawder says,  "I am thirsty also.  I will go to shore and get something to drink." So he gets out of the boat walks across the water to shore, gets a soda, walks back across the water, and gets back in the boat.

The rabbi thinks to himself "pretty cool.  I will try it."  So he says,  "I am thirsty also.  I will go to shore and get something to drink." He gets out of the boat and falls in the water and drowns.

Then the Holly Fawder said to the Pastuh,  "Do you think we should have told him where the rocks were?"